Blog 12: Broken families are to be blamed.

From my past blogs I have been writing things about “broken families are to be blame for the violence happening in the society.” I have cited examples that could probably be the cause like bullying, financial problem, films, media and more. Then I started thinking about people who opposes this idea. One example is Tony blare.

According to an article of Metro (News): ‘Don’t blame broken homes for guns.’ Tony Blair opposes people who are saying that all people who come from a broken family are the reason for the violence of the society he stated that this social issues must not be generalized, that the actual thing was there were specific problem to specific family. According to his opinion, People must not blame broken homes for the Britain’s gun and gang culture.

He stated that families must be dealt in a “special case.” Because it is a general problem
“If you end up saying there is a general problem then you can talk about tax breaks for marriage, extra money on tax credits, extra child benefit. All of those would help all families.”
But again, for his opinion it should not be generalized because, not everyone encountering such issues of being in a broken family has to do with this social issue.

“Those families are families who, fortunately are a small number, but their problems are so intense and so profound and they are so shut out from the normal way of living in our society that unless you are prepared to intervene at a very early stage … you are not going to deal with it.”

Because of what Tony Blair said made me think about a lot of thing, I am from a broken family and when I was young I bully people and one of the main reasons was because of the situation happening in my family and even a “simple bullying” affects the society. Although it is not as tremendous of what had happen to Britain, it may be a simple violence but it may actually be the start of something tremendous.

Maybe not all children from a broken family does this because, people are different. Parents have their own way of raising their children. It is really depending on how ones parent or guardian orients children. At the moment my mother figured out that I was bullying students in school. It was the happiest moment in my life because, that was the moment when my mother and I became open with each other. I shared my insights, my deeper hidden feelings with her. That was actually very effective, parents may not be able to intervene their lives early, I could cite the example of what my mother did to me, and in spite of what had happen to us she still became a mother and a parent to me. Things aren’t too late for everyone. But, as early as possible “build a family” even though it is broken, you are still in a family.

Again, we must not blame all parents just because of this incident; they may be a big part of what had happen but, maybe this incident must be a warning for every family. This is a lesson for everyone.

Post 11: Blended Families

Have you ever imagine how are you going to be if you are part of a blended family?

A Blended Family is a family formed from broken families. According to Merriam Webster, “Blended Family is a family that includes children of a previous marriage of one spouse or both.” As I was researching random things about broken family and divorce I was brought to this site “Separation and Divorce”  According to Family TLC, Blended families are: “Children accepting a step parent and step siblings, the introduction of half-siblings resulting in jealousy and family conflict, starting a relationship with a step child and learning how to parent both biological children and step children in a harmonious manner.” I think anything that is close with this kind of situation.

According to Nikki Philipps’ article “Blended Families: Merging Two Families Under One Roof”

“…trying to raise the children of your spouse or partner from a previous marriage or relationship is a trial by error task at best”

It would be a very hard task and a bold decision for the two different parents to merge their families in one home. It should be a bold decision and children must be well-oriented about this.

Let us use Drake and Josh (a children TV show) as an example, it is a movie about blended families. It’s a story about two teenage guys (Drake and Josh) who became stepbrothers because their parents got married. They have a very complete opposite personality; Drake is a “heartthrob-type” of guy that every girl dreams of, he’s role is like a cool and mesmerizing type of person, while Josh is the nerdy and dork type of guy. It’s really unimaginable for them to be patch up. But, eventually everything went well and they considered themselves as if they were biological brothers.

For their case, I think Drake and Josh’s parents in the story handled the situation well because, even though at first it was kind of awkward and unusual; they were able to manage it and make things at ease. As you could see it is a very peculiar situation. Even though I never experience being in one, I could say that starting another family is not going to be easy, because each member of the family will be adjusting for a new environment, new people, new home and everything will not be at the usual situation as before. Although we all know that things are not going to be the same anymore, the best thing that anyone could do is to give a good orientation to children. Remember “Their future is in your hands.”

As I was researching for more information about blended families, I saw this article of Candice Lewis: “4 Benefits of Living in a Blended Family.”  Before I opened the link, I tried to brainstorm some benefits of being part of a blended family instead of thinking about the negative sides of it, and all I thought about was “People in this situation will have the opportunity of having a new beginning and they will have a bigger number of family members.” So I opened the link and read the 4 main benefits, which are: “Happier Parents, Extended Family, Higher Lifestyle and More number of role models”

What I learn about this, is to see the positive side of the every situation. Do not think about the problem instead; think about the solution to the problem. And before making a major decision we should think about the things that might happen and the people involved or are going to be affected by ones decision. 

Post 10: Divorce, Separation, Broken family – Seeing its positive side

When you say divorce, the next thing that comes to one’s mind is having a broken family.

How do you consider a divorce? How do you see having a broken family? How do you find children opened in this situation at an early age? Are you bothered? Is it a positive or negative thing for you? Is it really a big deal?

For most people they see broken families and divorce as a negative thing, because they say that a typical family is always complete; it has a mother, father and their children and also because the negative side is more evident than the positive side.

According to some articles that I've read, children in broken families are usually in pain, shocked full of anger that could to lead numerous crimes; they become rebellious, depressed, that engages them to use drugs and drink alcohol. They become depressed and find revenge and a lot more things. It's also stated that they could even kill themselves if they are not able to handle the situation anymore. But, on the other hand some say that divorce and separation should be considered positive. One example is Lisa Ling and Delaine, They wrote articles about the positive side about broken families.

An article of Cathy Meyer: “My Kids Witness Broken Families – And it’s a Positive Thing.” Delaine is a parent, ever since she was young; she was used of her friends encountering such situation. All she thinks whenever she hears another story is that her friends' life is doomed because at her time “child of divorce was marked with fear and shame.” It is fine for her that her children is exposed to TV shows that portrays broken families like Drake and Josh that shows blended family and iCarly that shows absence of parents.  As she stated, “I like being there to field my kids’ questions and discuss issues these programs address.” She even stated that she is happy that her kids are having healthy young role models that don’t come from the perfect nuclear family.

Another story is Lisa Ling’s experience, when she was at the age of seven her parents divorced. For her, it was the best thing that happen in her life because, she believed that her parents are not really meant for each other. And instead of stressing out their selves it’s better for them to separate. After the divorce of her parents, they (her sister and Lisa) experienced two different kinds of lifestyles with two different people. Their parents even became friends after that incident.

I never thought that there was actually a positive side of this kind of situation. As I read different kinds of opinions and stories, I tried to look back on my experience and realized that there were actually positive sides behind it. I became stronger (mentally and emotionally), I was able to know my talents and abilities because all I wanted was attention (I never knew that it was actually positive), and I also strived to be in the honors, it changed my perspective and my outlook towards life, I became more optimistic and thing changed and was inverted around. I realized that It is good to see things positively, than looking on the negative side of a condition.

Post 9: Financial Problem

Financial problem is one of the major problems for most families, this is one of the reasons why some families give up and fall apart. Are you going to give up your family just because of money?

Financial problem should not really be a big issue, but why do they make it big? I’m wondering why some people go crazy just because of money, as if they are possessed.  According to some investopedia staff in investopedia.com “Everyone uses money. We all want it, work for it and think about It.”  Basically money is something that would just come and go in a person’s life. It may be essential or necessary for everyone, but I think it is not a valid reason to make a ruckus or fuss about it.

According to Janese Silvey’s article “Financial problems take toll on families”– “children’s behaviors are affected by issues beyond their immediate surroundings.” As Gustavo Carlo stated, that “Parents who experience financial problems and depression are less likely to feel connected to their children. And those children are less likely to engage in positive social behaviors, such as volunteering.”

Being a parent is going to be a very bold and tough decision. Parents must also be considerate about their children, because how the children behave is also affected, especially when parents are detached with them.

Each member of the family especially the parents must know how to be responsible in handling money. At the first place, parents should know that before entering a married life, one should be prepared encountering such problems or at least be ready and responsible enough to stand by their own before making any decision.

Post 8: Bullying

Bullying - when one says “bully,” what’s the first thing that pops into your mind: little children teasing each other, parents abusing their children, sexually harassing another person, fist fighting, or saying statements of racism towards another person? Have you ever been bullied by your friends, classmates, and family - or have you ever thought that you are a bully yourself?

Well according to Katherine Lee, “Bullying is intentional aggressive behavior. It can take the form of physical or verbal harassment and involves an imbalance of power.” Instances of bullying are when you tease or embarrass another or when you feel like hurting somebody. It may be for a reason or it could be just for the fun of it.  Bullies are people who enjoy the misery of others.

I have had classmates before that bully other students because they are not noticed in their own home. Bullying would be their way to express their feelings of wanting attention from their own family; their actions are a way of compensating for the attention they do not receive at home. They don’t care if people will hate them; all they want is their attention.

As Ron Banks stated in his article,"Bullying in School" - Bullies need someone to discipline and supersede them, because they seem to find joy with other’s misery. According to studies, bullies often come from homes where physical punishment is implemented.

In the past, I thought that bullying is helpful especially in teaching another discipline. Personally, I was bullied and I became a bully; I’ve hurt my best friends physically and emotionally because I thought it was a way to help them get high grades. I thought it would be helpful because that was how I was trained. But I realized it wasn’t good for them, because it created a negative effect on them. They become traumatized because of what I did; they started thinking that if they would do any small mistake, I would bit them. Eventually I realized the exact point was to be afraid.

Discipline with physical abuse should be something that one would think twice about doing. It may create a negative or positive outcome. In my case, I was motivated through physical and emotional pain, but they eventually comforted me. I’ve learned that although fear is one factor to use in discipline, love is also as important.

Post 7: Early Pregnancy

Have you ever heard someone or maybe one of your friends saying "My boyfriend is my family" or "My girlfriend is my life?"

I’ve been hearing these lines everywhere specially from the youths today. I personally experienced finding love from others and thirst for an attention of a father. So, at an early age I engaged in having an early boy-girl relationship which I knew was wrong. Although, in this generation it’s considered as a norm; still, it’s wrong.

We all know that children who are in “Broken homes” are experiencing lacking something; emotionally and physically. And people who feels lacking something seeks for that satisfaction. And maybe for them they could find that satisfaction from their opposite sex.

According to an article of Juliet Neil-Hall "When children’s relationship needs are met they feel secure, happy and confident.” 

In my case before, I did not feel that security. I am an only child and my father left us at an early age for another woman. So, my mother was forced to go abroad and work to support my needs. I read an article that was kind of similar to the story of my family, but in her case she got pregnant at an early age. “The alarming rise of teenage pregnancy” by: Henrylito D. Tacio

Joan was 10 when her parents separated. Like me, her father left them for another woman and her mother decided to go abroad to support them. So she got to the point that when she had problems, she don’t know whom to lean on. At the age of 16 he had a boyfriend, and I think she found security in him that’s why she decided to be in a relationship. Then one time in their JS Promenade they sneak out the party to drink and extend the happiness. The following day she woke up naked in bed with her boyfriend. A month after that she broke up with him when she discovered that he’s been cheating, and eventually she figured out that she is pregnant.

According to Henrylito D. Tacio, “Other reasons why teenagers these days engaged in sex early in life are due to family problems, broken family, peer pressure, influential trends (regarding sex), lack of attention and love from parents, lack of moral values, failure to nurture with good principles, curiosity, lack of information about sex, use of illegal drugs, lack of guidance, prostitution and unintelligent decisions.

“

Basically, looking back on what happen to Joan is because of what her parents did. No one was guiding her at one of the most the crucial stage in her life. Even though her grandmother took in charge of her, she was too strict with her that made her feel that no one was with her. Of course her friends may be their but they don’t know what to do. This gives a conclusion that, parents must be very particular in raising a child. Not because they are already teenager they could stand by their own. It’s like teaching someone in driving. At first, you guide and teach them and then if you know that they are already able to handle the car, of course you won’t leave them at once. You have to check them if they could drive by their own; until you are confident enough to let them drive alone.

Post 6: Parenting

 “…good parenting does not come easy… you can’t go to college and get a degree in parenting.”

These are some of what Richard Patterson wrote in his book “Families with Faith.” Parenting is basically about “handling.” Instilling proper values and discipline but it is not all about that, it is also about how parents set and prepare an individual physically, emotionally and intellectually.

I have a question to all the parents out there, Are you there for your sons and daughters in their bed time? Or in times when they needed you the most? When they needed a help for their homework? When someone fights them? Could they approach you easily? Or do they still need to set an appointment with you just to talk to you?

I read a story about a son who was thirsty for his father’s attention; the little kid asked how much does his father earn for a month and his father got angry because he raised such question but his son was actually planning to buy the time of his father. – “How much Dad"


Giving a little time and attention actually means a lot for children. Especially at the infant to elementary school stage of one’s life, which is the very delicate stages of an individual’s life because, it is going to be his foundation and at this stage he is starting to build a life.

At the moment a child comes out from the mother and learns how to speak mama and papa until he learns how to walk by his own.  We should know how to mold them. Richard Patterson stated that parents can’t program their children like a computer to turn them out just the way they wanted. You can’t dictate what your children are going to be. But you could mold them, on how they should think, how they should acts and how they are going to be in front of other people, on how they communicate and more.

I am not a parent but I know that even though I grew up in a broken family, my mother molded and raised me properly.  She never told me anything against my father but instead she explained to me one by one, what is happening in our situation. I knew in her part it was very complicated because, she should choose the right words to say and right actions to show.

Being a parent is being a good example to your children. Not only to supply your children’s needs and to give a lot of material things but, it is training your child with proper ethics and introducing them in the real world. To know which is wrong or which is right. It is like holding a bird; when you hold it too tight it might die and if it’s too loose it might escape.

Post 5: Substitute Family

Children who are not that close with their family make substitute families, maybe their friends, school, work, sports, music.  Children would tend to create their own family.

I personally did create my own family, thinking that these things will fill my emptiness. I joined different school activities in dancing, singing, joining speech choir, competing in different art contests because, I want to feel loved because I thought that people would looked up at me.

But this is different from what I’ve mentioned earlier, a book of Michael K. Carlie caught my attention “A Personal Journey into theWorld of Street Gangs” he said, “Gangs form due to the absence of a family and its unconditional love, positive adult role models, and proper discipline.”

I also had a friend who was a part of a gang, and she told me it was her second family because she believes that they were the only one who understands her. Most members of gangs experience brokenness that is why they try to find people who would accept them.

According to his book a writer named Jankowski wrote, “I found that there were as many gang members from homes where the nuclear family was intact as there were from families where the father was absent.“

Proper handling and parenting must be done from the very start, once the children felt isolated, alone, left, cast-away it would contribute a big change in an individual’s life. He would create a negative outlook in life, low self-esteem and the tendency is he/she will rebel and a lot of people may be involved or damaged.

CHAPTER I

Contribution of Broken Families to the Propensity of Violence to the Society

  

A Research Paper Presented to

Mr. Dustin Celestino of The English Resource Center

Asia Pacific College

Magallanes, Makati

In Partial Fulfillment

Of the Requirements for the Course

RESWRITE-Research Writing

  

Sigrid B.Gonzaga

February 2013

Chapter I

INTRODUCTION

A.    Background of the Study

Most products of broken families contribute to the propensity of violence. Bad handling is one of the reasons why this situation affects generation by generation. A family consists of a father, mother and their children. Intangible things, immeasurable love and care, bind a home together, but the saddest part is when the home starts to break. It is one of the major problems of society that should be given enough attention. The behavior of a family setup affects the social, economic and political aspects of a country. It should not be taken for granted as if it will fix the problem on its own. (http://ambbfa.blogspot.com/)

Broken families in Britain were to be blame in the riots happening there. They say that people who are part of the riot are people with low educational background, from deprived areas, and are gang members. It all started when the people raised a protest because the Metropolitan Police failed to inform the people and shot the man named Mark Duggan close to Tottenham Hale Station, and the riot started. After Mark Duggan’s death, he was found to be a part of a gang and is a family man. (http://www.theweek.co.uk/people-news/3253/mark-duggan-gangster-family-man-or-both)

Nowadays, being in a broken family becomes a norm. Number of divorces increase and children living with both parents decreases. And some of the worst aspects of human nature had been tolerated and indulged. People think that a person who lives in a complete family has more moral values than broken families—judging happens.

Having a broken family affects the development of an individual, in which the situation may be absorbed by one’s view on society. According to Peter Fagony, Unattended broken families is the most important issue affecting society. Because of how the child’s brain develops, it is easiest and most cost-effective to intervene early. As for Alasdair Palmer, she said that early intervention to the thinking of youths can make a tremendous contribution to improving our society.

Broken families have something to do with what is happening to the society. On the way they were raised, the surroundings that they start with and the approach and a lot more People have different perspectives. It’s on how they are being raised, positively and negatively. On one hand, if they were raised up by people with positive outlook in life, then theirs will be positive as well. Success in life is a big chance. On the other hand, if they were raised up by people who have negative perspective in life, then theirs will be negative as well. Possibly, they could be a huge problem in the society. However, if they were being raised with counseling from people with proper thinking, then they will have a better life ahead and they will not be a problem to the society. Thus, counseling is advised to be done at the very early stage.

This paper focuses on the contribution of broken families to what is happening to the society

B.     Statement of the Problem

This study aims to answer this question:

I.                   In what ways does a broken family contribute to an individual's propensity for violence?

C.    Significance of the Study

Divorced Parents – This research paper would be able to help divorced parents resolve or inhibit probable destructive effects that may cause an enormous situation to the society.

Children- this would help and give an idea to the youth stop to the heredity of the situation for the upcoming generations.

Government – Knowledge of Government Officials from past situations would help anticipate on what may happen. That would have a better leading strategy.

D.     Scope and Delimitation

This study focuses on the contribution of broken families to violence. Broken families are being tolerated in our present generation. This study also concentrates on an individual’s development from different perspective of different parents that would create an enormous effect to the society.

E.     Materials and Methods

The research engages an informative method that will be centered on any broken family or broken home topic that would also have to do with the perception of the society. Its objective is to prevent impending broken family issues that affect violence to the society.

Surveys would be about from different point of views of people in complete and broken family. On how they contrast and how are they alike.

F.     Definition of Terms

Divorce-The legal dissolution of a marriage by a court or other competent body: "her divorce from her first husband"

Intervention- The action or process of intervening.

Propensity- An inclination or natural tendency to behave in a particular way

Riot- A violent disturbance of the peace by a crowd

Violence- Behavior involving physical force intended to hurt, damage, or kill someone or something.

Post 4: Broken Family Fims

“Ohana means family, family means nobody gets left behind. Or forgotten”

Remember this touching line from one of our favorite cartoon in old times, Lilo and Stitch?

Youths nowadays are too fascinated with watching cartoons, anime and surfing the internet that it makes a big difference in their lives. It becomes an obsession that severely affects their growth. One of these is “broken family films”

A lot of films today, -specifically children’s films- are now focused on broken families. And I just noticed that most of the children’s films start with the family broken, where the parents are divorced, or one of the parents is deceased or they have abandoned their children.

According to Steven D. Greydanus’ blog about “Broken Family Films,” That being in a broken family, or specifically divorce, became normal nowadays. And according to him “broken family films” term is ambiguous it can mean family films that is about broken family or family films that are complete but has an idea of brokenness, even though they are complete it has a sense of lacking something.

Well for me broken family films, either they are complete or not as long as the plot of the story pertains to family experiencing brokenness it is considered to be a part of that category. But what do these films do to the youth?

Will this bring positive or negative thoughts in the youth’s mind? One example is “Lilo and Stitch” (an example of broken family film where parents died).  Although the child, Lilo, acted negatively about their situation at the beginning, her sister handled her with patience and discipline that’s why Lilo had a positive perspective and outlook in life. That would also influence the viewers to have a positive outlook in life despite experiencing situations.  Another example is “Zathura,” a story about two brothers with the older brother blaming his younger brother for the divorce of their parents, wishing that he was not born. Their father is having a hard time to play both roles of a father and a mother that made the kids compare him to their mother.

For me bad handling of a father is portrayed because, in the movie the father does not mind if his children are disrespecting him (which is somehow a reality for others). Causing the viewers, especially kids, to imitate the movie. There is a possibility for youths to think that being a stubborn and rebellious child is cool. Another is the negligence of the brother is portrayed. Kids are always going to be at their exploring stage and they should have proper guidance while growing. It is the moment wherein they are still building things in their mind.

“Going forward means learning to play the game: to take turns; to spin the dial and take what comes; to move along the track set before you.” says, Steven D. Greydanus

The main thing of the movie is “you can’t go home without finishing the game.” The game is all about “restoration” that represents “having a desire to restore the family again.”

Because of this very influential media, as well as the representation of useless or single parents provides an unfit role model for younger people. It’s even worse that they’re left and expose in front of the television at an early age. In conclusion, young people should not be left in front of the television, specifically the programs where it will affect them in a negative way unless they are instilled with proper guidance.

Post 3: Society In Different Shades

Are you a product of a complete or broken family? Did your parents raise you successfully? If you were raised in a broken family, how did you overcome this situation? And for those who were in complete family, how do you feel about people on your opposite situation? How does having a broken family affect society? These are some questions that I asked during my interview with different types of people who have different experiences and perspectives in life.

And after hearing different testimonies and insights from people who grew up in either a complete or broken family, these are the results. Some people from a complete family say that they pity and felt sad for those people who are in a broken family because they knew how happy it is having a complete family; while some say that even they are complete, they still feel like they lack something even though they were given proper education because their parents just don’t care. One of them, who are a part of a broken family, told me that they overcame their situation because they helped each other by getting their strength from one another. Someone also said that instead of complaining, they just used their situation as an inspiration to pursue their dreams.

Going back to my previous blogs, a bond of a family is one of the important things to make the family strong. It is one of the major things that would affect each and everyone’s life. As Art Buchwald say “Family is the basic unit of the society.” Everything starts at home. Inside the four corners of the house, you will grow, learn things, and develop your thinking. A person’s attitude would manifest on how the society is right now

But what is happening in our society these days? According to different articles and forums, we are in the generation wherein the society is polluted by lots of riots, chaos, crimes, racism, unwanted teenage pregnancies, drug users and more. How did a broken family become a reason for these things?

Well according to my interaction with some people, One said “children who grew up in a broken family is a big problem to the society because there are possibilities that they might go in the wrong path in life, because no one was there to guide them all throughout, to correct them and because of that, sometimes what they think is wrong is right.” Another said that "some became delinquents, they become rebellious. That's why numerous crimes happen; many are jailed, many died, and a lot of people are affected."


Like on what happen in Britain. Broken Families were to be blame on the riots and chaos in their country, while searching on what really happen in this incident I came across to this article, "Broken societies need strong families – Ask Britain!" David Cameron,(British prime minister) says, that the solution to the problem, is families: “So if we want to have any hope of mending our broken society, family and parenting is where we've got to start.”

Maybe if broken families were reduced, there will be a decrease in crimes. I was even shocked while researching this; that it had something to do with our society today. It made me realize about a lot of things, that this is an alarming message for everybody.

But not everyone from a broken home caused chaos in our society. People shouldn't look down on them; things really happen for a reason, great or small. And from every circumstance, we should learn that we shouldn't get revenge, but to start a change.

Post 2: Broken Society

How does broken family really affect the society? Does it bring harm to the society? Are they a big head ache to other people? Is it really considered as a social issue?

According to Alaissa Nerriel

“Broken family is a major problem of the society that should be given enough attention.”

I was wondering how people respond, react or feel with people who grew up in broken families. Are people aware and do they care about how they feel?  An article, written by Katie Razzal in 2011, caught my attention after doing a bunch of research about how people, living in this situation, affect the society: “Can society afford not to fix 'broken families'? “

It stated that the broken families were to be blame on the riot that was happening in UK that time and we might prevent this by giving them the proper attention, most especially the children by therapy and counseling as early as possible. Because it might lead to depression and anti-social behaviors while growing up.

People have different perspectives. For me it’s on how they are being raised, positively and negatively. On one hand, if they were raised up by people with positive outlook in life, then theirs will be positive as well. Success in life is a big chance. On the other hand, if they were raised up by people who have negative perspective in life, then theirs will be negative as well. Possibly, they could be a huge problem in the society. However, if they were being raised with counseling from people with proper thinking, then they will have a better life ahead and they will not be a headache in the society. Thus, counseling is advised to be done at the very early stage.

Professor Peter Fonagy FBA, a psychologist at UCL and The Anna Freud Centre put it more simply: "This is the most important issue affecting society. Because of how the brain develops, it is easiest and most cost-effective to intervene early."

We do not really notice why people have differences. If we carefully take a look at other people’s lives, why they have such negative thoughts, we can say that the upbringing is an important cause. Therefore, it is advisable to have counseling while young.

Brain development affects society. According to Alasdair Palmer, Early Intervention of parents can make a tremendous contribution in improving our society.

If people respond to these issues as early as possible, we can resolve things that are happening. In our present society, having broken family may be a big factor leading on to the actions of people in our society. Others may not notice but - yes, this situation creates a big impact on society’s morals, values and actions. Regardless of the issues between partners, they should’ve been more responsible because the future of a child is in their hands. Awareness regarding this issue could help partners or parents have better family planning, thus giving more importance to the future and welfare of the child. Values and morals that build the foundation of the family could be passed on from generation to generation. Though it may not be easy or quick to resolve the issue, if one starts now – change is still possible. Let’s start inside the family.

Post 1: "A Tree With Broken Branches"

A family consists of people, not necessarily blood related, who are faithful to you whether you’ll be or not. They give you the fullness of joy and make you cry because of such laughter. They are the reason why you exist and they will be with you no matter what. But what would you feel if one of your parents leaves not because they need to go, but because they want to? How does it feel to be a part of a broken family? How do people who grow up into this situation react to this?

Being in a broken family would be one of the hardest parts in someone’s life. No man wants to be placed into a situation where one can’t find a shoulder to cry on or another heart to share your happiness with. I, myself, have experienced this situation. My dad used to work abroad to support the needs of the family, while my mom chose to stay at home and fulfill her role as a house wife. Though at an early age my dad had left us because for another woman and my mom was force to leave and work in abroad to support my needs. Because of this, I had to adjust to different guardians’ ways of raising their children. Now that I’m older and able to think on my own, I still wonder how it would feel to grow up in a ‘stereotypical’ kind of family.

They say that people find closure in others who can relate to their own experiences. As I was reading different articles regarding people who have experienced the same things as I have, I found an article that had sparked interest in me. Alaissa Nerriel’s blog in Blogger, “broken family article”, had caught my attention. It inspired me to think more about my situation, and how to overcome it. She gave her own insight about what a family is and stated the difference between a complete and broken family. Though in her article, I've noticed that it was obvious she was simply stating facts but not out of experience. In my blog, I want to share my own opinions and feelings regarding this topic.

The article shows that a home is not a home without the bond that each of the family members share physically, emotionally, socially and manifests and affects through each of the member's lives. The people who are a part of a complete family have more of a chance to be with both set of parents, who can look after their children with more love and attention than those with a broken family. Most often, these children graduate with flying colors, and are more than capable of handling their problem head on.

Meanwhile, those within a broken family are a complete contrast. Teenagers that grew up in a broken family do not graduate, and suffer from emotional stress, depression and most often lead to suicide. But not everyone from a broken family grew up in negativity, as some have learned through their experience and led them to success. It is because of their experience living in a broken home inspired them to have a happier family than the ones they grew up in.

But for me, it doesn't matter if one is in a broken family; it all depends on the parent who handles the situation, whether or not they've given the warmth of their love for their children to make up the lack of another leading adult, and how they handle their situation. If they go through it with confidence and careful thought, I think the child will grow up as normal as any children that grew up in a normal and complete home.

“The impact of having a broken home usually manifests in the adolescence of the child experiencing the trauma of separation. It may cause an internal conflict which may result to depression, anxiety, disobedience, aggression and low self-esteem. “

According to Alaissa Nerriel’s blog, it would create a big impact on a person’s life to experience this. My mom always says, “Everything starts in a place where you call home”. I have been in a point where I felt insecure with my classmates, who all came with both their parents during school events, distribution of class cards, recognition and all. But my mom always assured me that I shouldn't feel as such. She always made me feel that I’m precious and secured, that I’m the best among the rest. She never spoiled me, and she disciplines me without going too far. Single parents must show more affection to their children, as well as explain things at the right time as to not make things complicated, and tell it when it's already too late.

Well for me, being in a complete or broken family does not matter as long as the love and affection in the family is present. All the child needs is more love, special care, extra time, attention and emotional support. My family is my weakness and in my situation, I made my weakness to be my strength. Let your weakest point be your strength. Misunderstandings, problems and circumstances are really part of any relationship; it’s how you handle situations. In the end, they’re still your family no matter what.